Fifth article in the Release goal setting series
Make a list of the 3-5 most significant negative events in your life.
I know from experience that simply asking this question might bring tears to your eyes, it might cause you to relive those moments with some intensity. And the more intense a reaction this question elicits, the more important it is for you to take this very important step:
Process your pain.
Our natural reaction is to ignore, run from or supress our pain. But then it simply goes underground and does its dirty work unseen. When we process it, that is when we recognize it, name it, and deal with, we short circuit its effects. Often this processing needs to be done with the help of a professional counselor, and that's okay.
Now here's a great secret: When we process our pain, we see how it has impacted us, but we also realize it doesn't define us. Read that sentence again. Our pain will impact us, but it doesn't need to define us.
So process your pain: admit it, recognize its effects, learn its lessons, discern its limits, and then get ready to move ahead!
Sixth goal setting system article
I'm glad you're still here! That last step scares off a lot of people. Dealing with our pain is never any fun, but the rewards can be astonishing.
You've been challenged, in the past two weeks, to Harness Your History, first by listing your key life-shaping events, and then last week by focusing in on the most significant negative events. The goal was for you to process your pain- with professional help if necessary.
Now we shift gears to another aspect of Harnessing Your History:
Embrace Your Encouragement.
The exercise here is to list the things people have said or done to encourage you throughout your life. Take a few moments right now to begin your list. I challenge you to write down at least 10, ideally 20 or more words or acts of encouragement you have received from others. And if you have some "hard data" such as cards or email or other items to back up that encouragement, pull those together to. Next time (in a couple weeks) I'll tell you what to do with those items to help you Embrace Your Encouragement!
Until then, Press On!
Daren Wride